Bible as a source of morality
This quite popular email has been forwarded many times and posted on quite a few websites, I imagine. I've just found it in my inbox myself. Usually, I don't like copy-pasting somebody else's content, but in view of its sheer brilliance, I'm compelled to post it on my blog, just like many others have. So, here it is:
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Owning A Canadian
On her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a U.S. man, and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
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Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.
1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.
Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take
offense.
4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors.....They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend).
He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.
Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your adoring fan,
James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus,
Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education
University of Virginia
P.S. It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian.
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More posts from this category: Why do atheists attack religionChurches uniting in their battle against pornography
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27-06-2012
We have to remember when and by whom the Bible was written. Like all old pieces or writing, it was edited without our permission and not always to our benefit. Any book written today will undergo the same scrutiny in a few thousand years. I prefer to take from the Bible what is useful to me and what represents peace. This is what the message of Jesus was. The rest is the work of human beings, who wrote the Bible, ostensibly as a result of personal experiences. You should, if you choose to indict the Bible, also specifically make mention of the Quran, which is also filled with contradictions. I know it's more palatable to bash Christianity, but we ought to deal out our doubt in equal measure. People wrote the Bible and other great books of religion, and people are imperfect. Just my opinion. I don't see liberals being critical of other religions nearly as often. Possibly because most Christians, at least in the western world, are white, and it would appear somehow racist to bash a religion that involves almost exclusively of color? It's worth thinking about.
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 Irina |
27-06-2012
This is a question of Bible's inerrancy. Some claim it is a word of God start to finish, some say it has human errors in there. The thing is, if we acknowledge that Bible isn't complete and inerrant, we can no longer use it as an authoritative book, then we treat it like any other book written by humans. Then no one should be saying 'because Bible says so' without providing any additional arguments to support his position. Because no one knows for sure which parts of Bible are 'inspired by Holy Spirit' and which are reflective of its many writers and editors charachters. By all means, take the best of any book. Problem starts when you're waving your book in front of your fellow countryman and saying he can't marry his friend because your book says so. (i dodn't mean you personally) Unfortunetely, I don't know much of Quran to offer substantial criticism. Reading it is a low priority so far, but some day I hope to make time for Islam and Judaism. I have every reason to bash Christianity because it is prevalent in my country and I know quite a bit about it, being an ex believer myself, having read New Testament several times and listened to lots of preachers. I think its time to grow out of religion in general. As long as we're picking and choosing which verses of the books make sense and apply today, might as well acknowledge we are the ones making the moral decisions, we use our own wit and moral feeling to determine whats right in the Bible and what isnt. |
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18-07-2012
Then there is also Numbers 31, where you also have topics of murder and women counted and divided amongst men like the were cattle/donkeys and virgin girls seen as a prize and also basically genocide.
I could also never figure out how building a ark and having animals on it would allow the vast quantity of species we have today to be re-established. Does this mean all species today are offspring of the animals/plants that were on the ark? Also imagine having to sacrifice your own child only to be told, ha-ha-ha jokes on you? Guess I do not need to state where I stand. |
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Irina |
18-07-2012
CryoHunniton, there are 2 websites that have Bible passages systematized by topic. You can find much more references there with cruelty, mysogyny, murder, rape, slavery... skepticsannotatedbible.com and evilbible.com |
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21-07-2012
Hi Irina, thanks for posting the links. I feel motivated to read again and reveal more of reality and not, the sugar coated version that has been fed to us all these years.
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 Zenner
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15-08-2012
Brilliant... truly exhilarating... what kind of genious ever wrote this piece of genuine cynical humour?
My (sincere) bows to you, soulmate! (thank you for the real, real fun!!!) |
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Zeener
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15-08-2012
...and my (sincere) bows to you also, blog-hostess, for appreciating this jewel and posting it in your blog!
It takes a genius also to pick it out! |
 Peter
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23-12-2012
Hi Irina...a fellow rational and reasoning human being here. I was wandering through a maze of secular websites and found myself here. Nice site, and I enjoyed your YouTube shorts as well. You speak English very well, have you studied/lived abroad? What size is the non-believer population in the Ukraine? Here's my local Hollywood "house of worship", which includes a great theater: http://www.cfiwest.org/
Keep on fighting the good fight! |
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Irina |
23-12-2012
I haven't studied or lived abroad. In Ukraine it's the totally different perception of religion's place in life and what it is 'to believe'. The vast majority calls themselves believers simply because they 'believe a God exists' and that God is most likely a Christian God. They don't go to church (maybe once a year on xmas). Religion is considered private here. People don't ask each other what their religious beliefs are, friends can not touch this topic for years I guess. And that's why we don't have a strong atheist movement here either. As long as church stays out of politics it's fine, nobody minds it being there. There are no prayers in schools, religion is hardly ever mentioned by politicians. Sometimes, of course, we have some religious nuts crawling out and trying to impose their fairy-tale based values on the society, i.e. ban abortions, but that - thank Flying Spaghetti Monster - hasn't been getting much support. |
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Peter
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24-12-2012
WHOA THERE IRINA, YOU ARE A BLASPHEMER! Don't you know that the FSM is a false God invented by heathens out to destroy the one true Goddess, the Invisible Pink Unicorn (Bless Her Holy Hooves). As a non-believer, you shall be cast into "...the Great Pile of Manure, where dwarves will nibble at your kneecaps and the Purple Oyster will force-feed you pepperoni and mushroom pizzas."
The IPU was revealed to humankind many decades ago. "For Her Pinkness is such that it transcends pinkness. Yea, it is beyond the ken of man or mind to comprehend, but we shant question it for it is the doubter than shall be skewered upon Her Sacred Horn, like unto a shish kebab." [img]webkit-fake-url://917DA168-A62E-437C-991D-20A5C62B6AA2/ipulogoblack_small.gif[/img]::wink.gif:: BTW, where DID you learn your English skills? |
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30-12-2012
I would see that letter as an indictment of anyone who would take seriously anything in the bible or any other religious text. Look, we inhabit an extremely diverse world in which there are no clear cut lines of morality, such as it is tends towarads evolving depending on the situation.
Also, I would be concerned about the mental health of those advocating such archaic beliefs in todays societies. This includes Muslims as welll as Jews and Christians and others. While finding religion generally worthless I will not go as far as wishing they all would die in a fire. I understand the emotional and mental investments of their adherents even as I find such investments dubious and or silly. |
It's not rocket science it is built in knowledge that does not have to be taught. No one needs to teach you that you do not wish to be harmed, lied to or have your property stolen.